Posts Tagged ‘Love’

It’s Valentine’s Day and you didn’t get anything for your……… well, whatever you got.

So here ya go. Copy, print, and give to your special whatever.

Hope all goes well……….

ValentinesCard

 

 

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I’ve been in many locker rooms and showers while playing sports and I can testify that the “Black Man Myth” is just that, a myth.

That was until I ran across this story.

 

An Australian film crew stumbled upon this young lady while filming in southern Ethiopia. Apparently enlarging your mouth is a way of attracting a husband.

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So let me get this straight. In order to get a man and satisfy him you have to stretch your mouth so it’s the size of the Grand Canyon.

I must say, the Myth is true! At least in Ethiopia. I mean, MY GOD. If that mouth size is needed I can only imagine the size of Mister Happy.

I wonder though how the women control the “Gag Reflex”

 

There Is One Very Happy Boy In Texas.

FellatioSmith

Felicia Smith (alias Fellatio) a 42-year-old teacher performed a “full contact” lap dance on a middle school boy celebrating his 15th birthday in February in front of his Texas classmates.As he sat in a chair next to Fellatio’s desk she moved back and forth on his crotch and touched him all over his body. Then sank to her knees and put her head between his legs hence her new nickname, Fellatio. The student admitted that he spanked Fellatio’s buttocks a couple of times. Oh Mama!As music played, Fellatio said “I love you, baby. Happy Birthday. A birthday he will never forget.

Now I ask you. Why do this for FREE? My God woman, have you no sense of Capitalism?

She was consequently removed from teaching.

GroinPain_CGentil Ramirez , alias Genital Raminherz, of Gigante (real name), Colombia, took so much Viagra that he ended up needing surgery on his penis.

While multiple media outlets initially reported that the 66-year-old’s penis was amputated, Ramirez told Colombian newspaper La Nacion Thursday that his manhood is still intact.

He wanted to impress his wife, so he took far more of the blue pills than recommended. He had an erection for several days before he sought medical attention.

Doctors say that his penis was inflamed, fractured, and infected with gangrene. The mangled member required invasive surgery in order to keep gangrene from spreading to the rest of his body.

Nevertheless, Ramirez “is recovering well,” doctors told La Nacion.

Recovering Well?

Holy S#$T, the guy almost lost the one thing most important to a man!

His wife still has not been able to walk. Though doctors were able to do a pelvic exam using only a flashlight.

Ruben Chance James Fox and his wife, Amber Nicole Fox, have brought new meaning to “Doggie Style”.

Man_DogPorn Woman_DogPorn Apparently their sex life was getting boring, so they decided on a three-some. Unfortunately for the third-party, it was their dog! On top of that, they shot a video of the tryst. “Anything you can ever imagine a man and a woman doing to each other, she was having the dogs do,” Raeford Police Chief Franklin Crumpler remarked. They faced charges of bestiality, conspiracy and disseminating obscene materials, with Amber Fox facing an additional charge of soliciting a crime against nature.

Crime Against Nature, huh. You guys better stop eyeing the knot holes in trees!

The video is not available. It has been buried in the backyard.

LADIES!!!! Don’t Be Fooled By The Penis Snake!

Once you get to that “Special Moment”, SURPRISE!

That ain’t no Fun Sausage, you F&%k H#%d

No, actually it’s an unusual species with its NSFW nickname because of its appearance — a broad, rounded head atop a thick, cylindrical fleshy body. “But this phallic squirmer isn’t a snake at all but an extremely rare, limbless amphibian,” notes io9’s Lauren Davis.

Sorry Ladies. Just think if it was the real deal.

Look at that length!!!

In one of my previous Posts,”The Bigger The Cushion, The Better The Pushin’” Susanne Eman was attempting to be the fattest woman.

She has competition.

Pauline Potter became the world’s heaviest living woman last year, weighing in at a whopping 643 pounds. Now, Potter has her sights set on losing weight, and she’s turned to marathon sex sessions to help shed the pounds.

“I can’t move much in bed, but I burn 500 calories a session –- it’s great exercise just jiggling around,” Potter told Closer. Potter, who had been consuming 10,000 calories a day, hopes to reach her goal weight of 532 pounds with the help of Alex. The two have sex up to seven times each day.

She makes sure to have some fun, too.

“We love foreplay and massages and, as well as full sex, I pleasure Alex, too,”. “My bed is strengthened and, although I can’t buy sexy lingerie, I drape a nice sheet over me.”

With all the extra weight on her, Potter became depressed. She contacted the Guinness Book of World Records in hopes that winning the title of “World’s Heaviest Woman” would shame her into losing weight.

When Alex got wind of the publicity surrounding Potter, he decided to visit her and the flame was quickly rekindled.

“Within the first day of being back together we had sex six times in 24 hours,” Alex said. “Even though one of Pauline’s legs weighs more than I do, we’re able to position her body to make sex enjoyable for both of us.”

Alex, who weighs just 140 pounds, does most of the work in the bedroom.

“It’s really dangerous for us to have sex because at any moment the bed could collapse and one or both of us could be seriously injured or even killed from the impact,”

 I hope the lights are out, cause this is what ‘ol Alex would see!