Archive for the ‘Jokes’ Category

During a visit to my doctor, I asked him, “How do you determine whether an older person should be put in an old age home?”

“Well,” he said, “we fill up a bathtub, and then we offer the person a teaspoon, a teacup, or a bucket to empty the bathtub.”

“Oh, I understand,” I said. “A normal person would use the bucket because it is bigger than the spoon or the teacup.”

“No” he said. “A normal person would pull the plug. Do you want a bed near the window?” 

You never know what’s behind those doors.
Go ahead and push that button, IF YOU DARE!

I’ve always wondered why the DOT would put up signs in neighborhoods telling everyone that there were mentally challenged children living there.

This was always an ongoing joke, until my family threatened me if I didn’t stop.

BUT…. Now there is someone to carry on. Unfortunately I think she’s serious. She’s very concerned about Deer Crossing Signs.

I’m sorry, but did this girl not realize the ridicule she would get doing this?

If she wanted to show the world that fat girls can be Sexy Pole Dancers, it didn’t work. There’s a Ton a jokes I could make, so with a Large Butt, I won’t.

Lonely Days, Lonely Nights. What do you have……Air Sex!

Everyone knows about playing Air Guitar. It’s for people who have no clue in how to play a REAL Guitar. Well this is the same thing.

It’s for people who have no clue in how to have REAL Sex!!! So they pretend.

Get a load of these losers and you’ll see why they have to play make-believe.

On the bright side, you can’t get pregnant!

One of The Oldest Jokes On The Planet!

Two 8th grade students on a Canadian school trip were fooled into eating moose droppings by a chaperone and the teachers and principal didn’t do anything to stop it.

The incident happened on the recent two-day canoe trip. Karen Eyolfson, whose 13-year-old son was one of the students who ingested the moose waste, said her son took a bite after a parent chaperone told him that the animal feces were Smart Pills. “These taste like s**t!”

See, it works, you getting smart already!